Sun Unprotection

"This is SPF-86 - It doesn't protect you from anything."

Produce Pressure

"The stress of five a day."

Price Pimpin' Pumps

"Regular - Super - Super GREEDY."

Easter Basket Case

"We simply can't afford to multiply in this economy."

Gulf Shrimp Cocktail Party



"Forget Charlie Sheen! One year later - we're still dealing with oil sheen!"



Plastic Purgery

"Actually, I'm a cougar consultant."

Moronic Medications

"Ask your doctor - if side effects are for you."

Roasted Retirement

"What came first?   Economic game of chicken or the lost nest egg?"

Yoga Poseur

"Ouch! Is not my new mantra."

Local Dog Laws

"Generic dog food and lack of squeaky toys are sufficient grounds for running away."

Professional Courtesy

"My official title?  Hmmm - I'll have to research that and get back to you."

The Over Fifty Fridge